For many, the Fourth of July is a fun-filled holiday and needed respite in the summer season. It’s our country’s biggest summertime celebration. There are parades, picnics, barbecues, potlucks, friends, swimming, family reunions, and of course, fireworks. But if you have an eating disorder, this can be a day of anxiety, shame, and maybe even TERROR.
Holidays in general tend to be challenging when you have an eating disorder, and the Fourth of July is no exception. Here are four obstacles someone with an eating disorder may encounter during the upcoming Fourth of July celebration:
1. Eating with Others.
Eating is a challenge for someone with an eating disorder, but eating around others can be terrifying. When someone with an eating disorder attends a barbecue, party, potluck, etc. they are worried about other people watching them and judging them. Within their mind, they are attacked by unwanted and unfair comparisons to other people: how much less or more food other are eating; what kinds of foods others are eating; the size and shape of other people’s bodies; and even how likable, funny, athletic, witty, smart, etc. other people are.
2. The Food Itself.
Holiday gatherings tend to include foods which are delicious, and this terrifies someone with an eating disorder. They worry about their ability to control themselves or be tempted to eat foods they have deemed as unacceptable. And Fourth of July favorites like grilled burgers and hot dogs, pasta salads, sodas, chips, cookies, cake, and candy cannot be enjoyed. And when they challenge themselves to eat the “unacceptable” foods, they often pay for it later through engagement in self-loathing and disordered eating behaviors , negative self-talk, and unmanageable negative feelings.
3. Summer.
Summer is a double-edged sword for those with eating disorders. Although sunshine, warmth, longer days of sunlight, and more outdoor activities can increase mood and be exciting, nice weather leads to negative body image thoughts. Normal summer attire includes swimwear, tanks, and shorts, and someone with an eating disorder has difficulty trying to distract from the unrelenting, self-conscious thoughts about their body.
4. Alcohol
Fourth of July often involves fun summer cocktails, beer, and wine. For someone with an eating disorder, alcohol can be an obstacle for a few different reasons. For some, the calories which are consumed in having any alcoholic drink are too much to bear; beer, wine, and mixers are all firm “unacceptable” foods.
For others, alcohol is used as a means to cope with the stress. In order to be able to enjoy or simply tolerate the holiday, they may drink away their anxiety, only to feel it two-fold the next day. This often leads to a cross-addiction where someone with an eating disorder can uses either alcohol consumption of the eating disorder as a means to be in recovery for one.
All of these above obstacles make a good argument for why someone with an eating disorder may choose to stay in bed all day on the Fourth of July. However, having a nice day off, socializing with others, and actively enjoying summer on this holiday are very possible for people with an eating disorder. Eating disorders are a disease that disconnects people from others, and working with a treatment team to battle the obstacles is worth it.
If you have an eating disorder or are a support for someone with an eating disorder, create a safety plan for the Fourth of July which involves identifying the likely triggers which will take place and how to cope with those triggers using support.
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